Click here to subscribe to the print edition.new internationalist 150August 1985Click here to search the mega index.

Are you a
closet sexist?

Are your actions Conditioned by sexism? Despite the very best intentions sexism stalks our highways and byways, lurking in even the best-made cup of coffee and hiding in the comfort of freshly ironed sheets. Here is a chance to find out where you stand - or fall

Check one of the boxes next to the answer that applies to you,
then check your score and see how sexist you are!
*lf you are not in a couple, improvise. You need to for the ratings.

1

Someone tells a sexist joke. Do you:

a) Laugh.
b) Challenge them.
c) Change the subject.

2

You are at a New Year’s Eve party and you see a woman who is dressed very revealingly. You think:

a) Probably someone’s fancy piece.
b) Good on her - she probably has a more exciting life than me.
c) Nothing: glamour does not affect what you think of a person.
d) What an eyeful!

3

You are in charge of putting a baby boy in his day clothes, but you can only find a pink baby’s tracksuit. Do you:

a) Leave him in his night-wear.
b) Put him in pink without a second thought.
c) Put him in the trousers but not the top, or vice-versa.

4

How do you feel if you cry?

a) Embarrassed and ashamed at all times.
b) It made me feel better.
c) In private it does not matter, but in public you felt you should not have lost control.

5

If you are accused of sexism, do you:

a) Feel threatened - and laugh it off.
b) Feel threatened and reject the accusation.
c) Feel ashamed and apologise.
d) Not know what they are talking about.

6

What do you think of women-only groups, like that at Greenham Common Peace Camp?

a) Divisive because they exclude men.
b) Just an excuse to gossip.
c) An important form of mutual support.

7

You are asked why girls choose science subjects less often than boys. You explain:

a) The values behind science are so sick, girls do not want to join in.
b) Girls are just not good at figures and logic.
c) Teachers don't encourage girls to do science.

8

You phone up a couple of friends who have just had a baby. You want to go to a place where children are not welcome. Do you assume:

a) the man will come and the woman will stay at home with the baby.
b) the woman will come and the man will stay at home with the baby. [male: female: ]
c) they both come, having organised a babysitter.
d) You would never suggest such an outing to a parent of young children.
e) Instead, you take some food and drink over to their place. [male: female: ]

9

You are describing the tennis star Martina Navratilova’s style of play. You say she is a brilliant tennis player because:

a) Her game is as tough and powerful as a man’s.
b) She is powerful, accurate and a good tactician.
c) She looks nice.

10

A friend asks if you are a feminist. You reply:

a) No, they’re so shrill they damage their own cause.
b) Yes, it has changed the way I think.
c) Feminists’ lime-green monkey-boots and pink hair (or was it lime green hair and pink monkey-boots?) puts me off.
d) No. but I agree with some of the things they stand for.

11

You need to recruit someone for a job. A man and a woman - both of whom have children - are equally qualified. Do you:

a) Opt for the man.
b) Recommend positive discrimination and employ the woman.
c) Give them both interviews and presume that this will reveal the best candidate.

12

Do you initiate sex with your partner:

a) Always. [male: female: ]
b) Seldom. [male: female: ]
c) Often. [male: female: ]
d) What partner?

13

If you are planning or have had children, who chooses the timing?

a) You. [male: female: ]
b) Your partner. [male: female: ]
c) You agree on a right time.
d) No-one!

14

You are in charge of the baby for the day. While out the baby needs changing, but there are no diapers. Do you:

a) Curse yourself for forgetting to bring them. [male: female: ]
b) Curse your partner for not providing them. [male: female: ]
c) Grin and bear it. [male: female: ]
d) Remain oblivious to the baby’s wet bottom. [male: female: ]

15

You and your partner send joint Christmas Cards to mutual friends. Who does the writing?

a) You. [male: female: ]
b) Your partner. [male: female: ]
c) We take turns or we both write.
d) Never send them.

16

Do you have to write a list when your partner does the shopping?

a) Always [male: female: ]
b) Sometimes.
c) Never. [male: female: ]

17

When you cut your toe-nails is it:

a) In the bath-room cleaning up the parings afterwards.
b) In the bedroom, picking up a few of the biggest parings.
c) Watching television in the living room,
and you never notice what happens to the bits.

18

Who drives the car if you both go out in it?

a) You. [male: female: ]
b) Your partner. [male: female: ]
c) You take turns.

19

Your partner complains that you don’t do a fair share of the household chores. Do you:

a) Suggest you buy a dish-washer, or hire an au pair. [male: female: ]
b) Arrange to take over the running of the house for half the week on a regular basis.
c) Suggest that s/he tells you what to do and when to do it. [male: female: ]
d) Tell your partner they are lucky to have you. [male: female: ]

20

You and your partner are at a restaurant Do you:

a) Expect your partner to do all the ordering and pay the bill. [male: female: ]
b) Expect your partner to do all the ordering but share the bill. [male: female: ]
c) Share both the ordering and the bill.
d) Share the ordering but not the bill. [male: female: ]
e) Feel affronted if your partner offers to pay. [male: female: ]

*lf you are not in a couple, improvise. You need to for the ratings.

Your New Internationalist rating

Total if you are male =

Mens rating...

Under 45
Come off it! Add on at least twenty points - you are clearly fibbing. Telling little white lies for good of the Cause is just not good ‘nuff. Only the strictest honesty is permitted by feminists so between ourselves bit less bluffing is needed from you. In fact you are so wonderfully non-sexist that it would only embarrass you to be told so in print. So we will not do it.

45 - 90
You are clearly trying - even if you wish you didn’t have to be confronted over the dog-chewed, child graffittied breakfast table every other morning. Still, life as a committed non-sexist man is not too bad is it? Your children actually love you as much as Mum, and your work colleagues think you have gone crazy, so they do not ask you to all those boring cocktail parties anymore.

90 - 135
You make sporadic efforts to be anti-sexist - when you think you can pull more women that way. But some people have rumbled that one. But still - in the most secret niche of your heart of hearts - you want to settle down with a nice quiet girl, who will not be (you hope) terribly affected by the ideas that those feminists put about. Do not despair. It is time to sort out some of the contradictions in your life.

Over 135
You are the archetypal m.c.p. You are so unaware of your sexism that you make every mistake in the book and offer feminists a field day - pointing out when you suggest one of the ‘girls’ makes the coffee. You are so unspoiled as an it is really a pity to suggest you change - but there you are, life does stop without change doesn’t it. so to stop the rigor mortis we suggest you read, learn and inwardly digest at least half of this magazine. That should kill or cure.

Total if you are female =

Womens rating...

Under 45
Congratulations - not only have your survived sexism’s slings and arrows but you have drawn on feminism to overcome them. You are probably that common but endangered species called (deep breath) a strong woman. Your main failing will be that you get irritated when people refer to you in this way. Keep up the good work.

45 - 90
You are well aware of the ways in which you are disadvantaged, so you are almost out of the closet feminist camp. However you are still hovering. You know that you can he successful at work without getting into that feminist routine, but, to be frank, you know that you’ll be biting table-legs soon unless you partner bucks up and helps a bit more at home. Secretly, you dream of being strong and being . . . well, a feminist.

90 - 135
You are clearly one of those women who thinks that you can get away with feminine wiles and the flutter of eyelashes, and that you don’t need feminism. Slinking through the world accompanied by the patter of tiny stillettos, you are too busy trapping your man to be bothered about all this women’s liberation nonsense. Rushing to the exercise gym (fighting that flab) and to the solarium (sucker for the natural suntan) and dashing back to the health-food shop for your special vitamin supplements to match your vitamin-less diet is about all that you can manage in a hard day’s night. But beware the little black dress syndrome: women’s power behind the throne is distinctly limited since most men are not kings.

Over 135
You have made sure to be as little aware of the woman’s movement as you possibly can be.

You believe that every word that falls from Barbara Cartland’s lips is gospel truth. And you passionately believe that men should wear the trousers and that women’s place should be in the home. You keep your ball gowns and wedding dress in tissue paper and smother yourself in romanticism. Your pink spectacled nostalgia means that you never quite get the most out of life in the present. Our advice: try reading some feminist fiction (start with those listed in this magazine) and re-try this quiz in a year’s time.


On-line version developed by Simon Loffler
*You Must have internet explorer v4.0 or higher or netscape v4.0 or higher for the auto tally to function.

Illustrations by Alan Hughes


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